Stamps Explained for Morons

No one likes a smug stamp know-it-all. The title was mere click bait. But as a public service, I am going to reveal all. I'm sorry if you are a moron and took offense. It's just about stamps.

They have been a blessing to meself. They have enabled me to quit the fvcking rigged internet social structure. It's like trying to quit smoking. Some think it is an oral fixation or wtf. So it's said try some chewing gum or mints. Go sugar free. But this is about stamps. It's like the snot analogy of how the stuff goes from one finger to the next but never off the body, or earworms.

Stamps are my chewing gum.

I am a self-learned stamps genius. I honed the craft over the last year. It's basically about a ton of little tasks. Each stamp you identify and collect is akin to an ant moving a bit of leaf. Those ants can get a lot done. Once one gets over the learning curve, it becomes easier than eating a cupcake.

I finally put together my masterpiece. It is one big album using the sheets that require no hinges. That stuff is crap. You need to get a perforation gauge, a magnifier, the stamp tweezers and stamps. You can get wax envelopes to use for sorting. I got myself some non-acidic stock paper which comes in handy for placing stamps on for observation.

I won't share every detail. Use crap stamps at first when learning the craft. This is common sense 101. It's time to get down to brass tacks and reveal my secret. What stamps you end up with is fate. There's really no discussion there. But it is on each of us to know how to quickly and accurately identify stamps and without damaging them. If they are common stamps, then fvck them. Catalogue values are bogus. I better start a new paragraph.

Values have dropped dramatically. Stamps are looked at as stupid and for losers. Well, when I end up cashing them in for wtf, I'll be getting the last laugh.

I hate common stamps. They are worthless, period. I haven't sold any stamps yet and will eventually have to figure out the endgame. I'll be upfront with that bit. Yet, I am pretty good at identifying them. Collecting stamps is pointless unless one can both identify and present them. You basically need to know what you got and make it easy for the buyer.

You'll also need watermark fluid with the tray. Common sense. Here's the big secret. Two websites pretty much explain most of the info needed. Colnect.com makes it very easy to identify stamps. I think the biggest reason stamps have not been as popular as they could be for a pastime is because of variants. If one cannot figure out the stamps, where is the fun in that?

Colnect tells you the variants. I also like the drop down boxes. You can zero in on years and face values. There is a lot of scrolling involved. It does sort of feel like clerical drudgery at times. Settle down, Francis. It's a hobby with a bit of financial perks.

I then use stampworld.com because they give catalogue values for every stamp. I look at common stamps as being in three tiers. 12c stamps are not worth 12 cents. We need to be realistic. Stamps aren't given zero value. They get the ten cents or whatever for the shites and brilliant crack. The second low tier jumps up to 30c in value. Yeehaw? Whatever. Common is as common does. Now put those together in a plate block and maybe we can buy a candy bar.

I collect stamps that are worth 50c or greater. I don't fvck around. I keep those because I figure there are two tiers of loser stamps below them. The basement needs to start somewhere.

I wouldn't be doing this without the computer. Fvck leafing through bulky catalogues like the old-school days.

Make an album and create an inventory list to go with it. That's about it.

Unleash all stamp knowledge. Do not buy from any big stamp company such as [redacted]. Do not let older relatives get ripped off. They are a primary target.

Those two websites above get it done for me. If colnect says there are no variants, the ballgame is over. There is no need to check the perforations, watermarks, colours or whatnot. Stampworld let's me then see the stamp's relative value.

Catawiki is awful. What a mess and the prices seem way off. Stampworld seems accurate. They don't seem to fvck around. Now what that means in reality is something different. The higher the value of the stamp, the greater the value is, if that makes sense. You can't put lipstick on a pig. A gorgeous, fantastic common stamp is still stupid and sucks. But the better the stamp, the more accurate the catalogue placement. Yet, the junk is still only worth as much as someone will pay for it. And blah, blah blah.

I think stamps are fun. I like getting big mysterious lots that are packed with quality from old-school collectors probably no longer with us. That's how I found most of my great junk. Stamp dealers wanted to unload junk. They had too much junk. Is this Carlin? Didn't he always talk about stuff? I'm done. That's it. I said what needed to be said about stamps.